Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Simon's Birth Story


On Friday 1/20 at 9am, I went to see my midwife Rebecca. She stripped my membranes and gave me a concoction of cohosh herbs to see if it could kickstart labor. I was 41 weeks pregnant as of 1/20. I knew I would go "overdue" with this baby just like I did with Claire. Given the current condition of my cervix (which was dilated to a 3 and 50% effaced), she said I had a good chance of going into labor. I had cramping and irregular contractions all day. When I got back home from Rebecca's office, and in my 41 week glory, I went for a walk. I walked a little more than a mile hoping it would help get my baby here.

I had a feeling that I would give birth that weekend, although I tried not to get my hopes up. I knew that baby would come when he decided it was time. Brant was scheduled to go into work at 1:30pm. The irregular contractions I was having weren't too strong, but strong enough to where I had to focus, and breathe through them. Trying to focus to get through a contraction is not easy to do with a demanding three year old around. I wasn't sure I was in labor, or was going to even go into labor, but I just had a little feeling. I didn't want to call the person we had originally lined up to babysit until I was in actual labor. I didn't want to false alarm anyone, or have anyone have to watch Claire if it wasn't the real deal. It was almost time for Brant to go to work, and we decided on a whim to call his parents to babysit Claire. This was not our original plan seeing that they live an hour and a half away. The timing could not have been more perfect! Brant's dad was in town because he had just gotten off of a business trip and was heading back to Logan. Brant took Claire, and her already packed bag and met up with his dad. She was very excited to spend some time with her Grandparents. I was beyond thankful they were able to take her for the weekend. I was so happy that she was in an environment that she was familiar with, and hopefully was having too much fun to think to herself "where are my parents?" From what it sounded like, she had a BLAST with her grandparents, aunt and uncle and cousin "Jack Jack". I had such peace of mind knowing they could tend her for the weekend.

I sent Brant off to work, and decided to pass the time by just hanging out. I'll tell you what, I was bored stiff! I thought to myself "This is probably the last bit of alone time I'm going to have for a long long time, and I can't even enjoy it!" I passed the time by playing on the iPad, talking on the phone to my mom and sister, and watching TV.

I lost my plug around 5:30pm and started noticing more regular contractions around 6pm. I started timing them on a contraction timer app around 6pm. They were consistently 3 and a half minutes apart and 42-44 seconds long. I was so excited! I knew my body was made for this. I didn't want to call Brant to come home from work until things started getting intense. (Again, I was afraid of a false alarm and didn't want him to take off work for nothing.) I decided to heat up some home made chicken noodle soup. It was so delicious. I wanted to have some fuel for my labor, but wanted to eat something bearable in case I was going to throw it up later during transition.

My contractions continuted in this pattern until Brant got home from work at 9:30pm. They started getting really intense around 10:45pm. I wasn't really able to talk through them. We weren't sure if we should call Rebecca our midwife because we weren't sure how far along in labor I was, and didn't want to call her too soon even though she said she would come at any point that we would like her to. We decided to call her anyway because my contractions were getting really intense. I got in the shower to let the warm water run down my back to help my contractions. The amazing thing was that inbetween contractions, the pain totally vanished, and I got a nice break. That break made the labor so much more bearable. Brant thought it was funny that we would be having a conversation and I'd say "hold on... I'm about to have a contraction." We'd pause the conversation, I'd have a contraction, and we'd resume the conversation.

All through my labor and birthing process, I felt so keenly aware and coherent. With Claire, I felt like I was in a fog the whole time.

Rebecca arrived shortly after 11pm. Brant had already prepared the birthing tub while I was in the shower. When I would have contractions, I found relief by leaning on things. Leaning on the counter, the couch, and leaning on Brant. If I had to labor on my back without being able to walk/move around, I think I would have died!

When Rebecca arrived, she checked my cervix to see how far I had dilated and effaced. I was thinking that I would be 4cm, or 5cm dilated. I was shocked when Rebecca said I was 8cm and 80% effaced! My water hadn't broken yet, Rebecca said that she could feel the bag of waters, and just beyond that was the baby's head. I texted my friend Hayley who is a fellow photographer friend to come take photos to tell the story of his birth. She hurried down to my house.

After Rebecca checked me, we filled the birth tub and I got in. It felt wonderful.


The next hour was filled with contraction upon contraction. I kept my eyes closed during most of my labor. It helped me to focus. I tried not to rush myself or get impatient. I literally took things one contraction at a time, and one millisecond at a time. I didn't fight the contractions or fight the pain and pressure. I tried my best to breathe and not tense up. I knew that every second/minute that I would meet the other side of, brought me that much closer to holding my baby. I welcomed each passing contraction.


We decided after two hours to break my water. The baby was not able to make his way down the birth canal with the cushiony bag of waters in the way. Had my water broken earlier, I would have had him probably an hour or two sooner than I did. But I got out of the tub and Rebecca broke my water. After the next contraction, I got back in the tub and my contractions started getting really intense. They were almost too strong to bear, but somehow I was able to bear them. I spent most of my time on my knees leaning against the edge of the birth tub. This was a convenient position for saying lots of prayers. "Lord, be with me."

It was amazing to feel the baby inside, getting into position to enter the world. It was almost like he was kicking the top of my belly to further himself down. My breaks between contractions were getting shorter, and the intensity was constant. It came in waves, but the pain was still constant. The sensation came to bear down and push. Rebecca told me not to ignore it. Pushing helped relieve the pressure and made it feel better. The most intense part was when he was making his way down the birth canal. The pressure on my bum area was unbelieveable. I couldn't wait for that part to pass.

Brant was such a phenomenal support through the entire process. He anticipated my every need and was present and there for me 100,000%. It helped so much to hold and squeeze his hands through every contraction. Rebecca applied counter pressure on my lower back which helped a lot too. Towards the end when things were extremely intense, I was squeezing Brant's arms so hard. He said that it hurt pretty bad. I didn't have too much sympathy though. I'm pretty sure I was in a lot more pain. :)


I have heard many women say that while giving birth naturally, they would reach this point, or hit a wall and say "I just can't do it anymore!" And that after they accepted it and completely surrendered to it, it was then that the baby would come. I would not let myself think or utter the words "I can't". I knew that if I did, I would feel defeated and start to get frustrated. I welcomed every wave of intensity that came. Not only did I know that I could do it, I knew I had no choice, I had to do it.

Once the pressure on my bottom area passed, he made his way down the birth canal pretty fast and I began to crown. The "ring of fire" wasn't as bad as some have said, but it was really intense. I wanted to push him right out but Rebecca coached me to take it easy. I needed to let the pressure of his head stretch me out so I wouldn't tear. I had to pant in order not to push. I gently eased his head out and found so much relief by pushing his head out. Rebecca told me to look down to see his head. I couldn't move. I was so in the zone, and so focused. I didn't look down, I was just ready to push the rest of him out to hold him in my arms. I find it absolutely fascinating that when a baby takes his first breath is when the air hits their face, and not when they emerge from the birth canal. I knew he was safe.

With one final push, the rest of his body came out. I knelt during the whole thing. Rebecca guided him as he "swam" between my legs and I picked him up out of the water. His eyes were open and he was so alert. It was love at first sight. He was so peaceful, quiet, and alert. It was so amazing. He was born on Saturday January 21 at 2:56am. I did it!!!


I held him and we bonded over the next 15-20 minutes or so. Once our cord stopped pulsing, we knew that he had the perfect amount of blood and fluids sent to his body via the placenta. Rebecca clamped the cord, and Brant cut it. I still had some contractions, but nothing like the ones right before birth. They were totally bearable. It was then time for Brant to hold and bond with him.

I delivered the placenta, then moved to the couch to recover. I was amazed at how unhurried and peaceful everything was. The focus was on me and the baby. While I recovered, we put baby to the breast. He latched and nursed right away. He stayed on the breast and nursed for about 40 minutes. I was amazed at how well he nursed so soon! I was just so elated. The rush of bonding hormones and oxytocin were quite strong and happy. I kept saying "I can't believe I did it! I can't believe I did it! I can't believe it's over!"


I was so grateful to have my birth, my way and not have anyone telling me what me or baby needed to do on their time table, or whisk baby away for hospital procedures. There was ample time for bonding, yet everything necessary for the health of me and the baby was amply taken care of.

After he nursed, Rebecca did her newborn screenings and exam. He was perfect and healthy. After that, she weighed him and measured him. He weighed 8lbs. 8oz, and was 20.5 inches long. Brant fed me peanut butter toast and grape juice. It was so delicious.


I was very impressed with how on top of everything Rebecca was. She anticipated everything and kept everything superbly clean. She never had to say "hold on a minute while I get ____" She had everything ready at the precise moment it was needed. You'd think that birth at home would be a messy messy affair, but it really wasn't! Rebecca was so professional. There isn't even one single spot in my house! Having a 3 year old is far more messy than birthing at home. :)

After the baby was weighed and measured, Brant dressed him and it was time to settle down to sleep. After an hour or two after birth, everyone naturally falls into a "big sleep". We headed upstairs to our room for our big sleep. I was so happy and so thankful and on such a hormone high that I couldn't sleep. As Rebecca packed up her things and headed out the door, and as we settled down in bed, I remember thinking how happy I was with the fact that there wasn't going to be nineteen hundred inturruptions of hospital staff coming in and out of the room while we tried to sleep. There was such a quiet peace and happiness in our home.


The next morning we called our family and said "He's here!!!" They were so surprised! We hadn't told them that I had gone into labor. They also were pleasantly surprised when we informed them that we had him at home! We hadn't told anyone our birth plan just in case our plans changed. After spending a little time with baby and getting to know him a little, we named him Simon Dunn Pease. I don't remember feeling so elated in all my life! The joy was abundant and overflowing.

Claire got to meet him a few days later. She spent the weekend at my in laws and had a wonderful time! When she met him, her reaction was so precious! Her reaction was the sweetest thing ever! I'm so happy we have this video of it!


Simon is now a week and a half old. He is so sweet. I am so thankful that he joined our family. Claire has been such a wonderful and loving big sister to him. She always makes sure he is taken care of, and tells him regularly throughout the day how much she loves him and how cute he is. She has adjusted really well so far. Having a baby makes me realize all my blessings and gives me such a thankfulness in my heart for them. I'm so grateful for a low risk,uncomplicated and healthy pregnancy. I'm so thankful for my health and Simon's health that made it possible to have this experience. It is one that I will take with me for the rest of my life. I love my family so much!

Would I have a home birth again? In a heart beat. Natural birth wasn't nearly as bad, or terrible or awful as so many people like to say that it is. If you expect it to be bad and terrible, horrific and awful, it most likely will be! If you expect it to be a huge challenge that's going to have it's moments of extreme difficulty, and that it's going to hurt, but the hurt has a purpose, and the purpose is to put a baby in your arms, and you have confidence you can meet the challenge mentally and physically, it will probably be a good experience! (longest run on sentence ever, I know.) So many have said to me "I couldn't do it!" Granted, for various health reasons, or personality preferences, it isn't for everyone. But I think if one were to take on the challenge and have confidence that they could do it, they surely could! It was amazing.

I love my baby Simon more than words can ever describe. I'm so grateful for his presence in our family. I'm so grateful for his safe arrival. And most of all, I'm so happy to be a mother.

4 comments:

K. Bitton said...

Way to go Kate! My birth experience with Grant has pushed me more to the natural side than any of my other births. I was at least an 8 at 10:15 when I finally got the epidural, the anesthesiologist finished at 10:30 and it only worked for 1 contraction before he was born at 10:35! It was incredible the way I could do labor by my self. I was really interested in a natural birth before I got pregnant with Grant and when I was pretty much forced to get the epidural and the pit and the iv and with how fast I delivered, I'm quite confident I'll do it at home next time. Plus, it was like you said, the anesthesiologist pushed me to get the epidural and sent us the bill. I loved reading your experience, thanks for sharing! I am committed to an at home birth next time around:)

Smess said...

Beautiful story! I'm absolutely inspired by you and consequently proud of you and Brant. I hope I have the opportunity to go through pregnancy and choose home birth in the future. I love you!

Jeanette Miller said...

Wow Kate! You are amazing! I wanted to go all natural in the hospital with my nurse midwife, but of course I had complications and had no choice but a c section. It was the complete opposite of what I had imagined her birth to be! It was so invasive and everything but natural. I am so glad you got to experience your birth the way you wanted! (Of course I am grateful for c sections because who knows what could of happened!). Congratulations!

Amory Layne said...

This was so inspiring. He is beautiful! YOU are beautiful! I am SOOO looking into what my insurance will cover! i would LOVE to have a home birth! My pregnancy is already Uber high risk, but if I can find a midwife that feels like I can do it just fine, and afford it,its something I want. My experience giving birth to Jack in the Logan hospital was such a nightmare. I am so grateful we were there because of how sick he was, BUT, i feel like a lot of that sickness and so many of the issues were brought on by medications and doctor/hospital caused complications. You cannot rest while there. Its nearly impossible. Im so proud of you. You are inspiring and the pictures are stunning!
One question tho... did you have to keep reheating the water in the tub? Id want it nice and warm ;)